Motherhood & Chronic Illness

I often get asked,
“how do you do it? I don’t have kids but I have the illness and it kicks my ass on the daily and I just have myself to take after.” 

I don’t know how I do it to be honest, but I do know there’s no other option, theres no other choice.
It’s a job that has no sick days, No vacation, no emergency back up days.
It’s a job that when you’re contemplating staying in bed for 10 more minutes, you have littles ones around you that are asking when breakfast is and where are their clean socks. 

Its not about how I do it, or how I manage it. It’s about realizing that there are so much bigger things in the world that matter and that need your undivided attention than a disease that is slowly trying to take over your body.

And don’t get me wrong, I have my bad awful can’t manage can’t do it you couldn’t pay me enough to move days.
And those days it turns into 20% on my end and 80% on my husbands end. 

Those are the days if my husband isn’t home or he is working an off shift, my in-laws step in to take care of the 80% that I can’t manage.

Having 2 very busy boys is a lot, trust me. They are so close in age with each other which is wonderful and they love each other as brothers but choose to be best friends, their relationship melts my heart. 

Luca is 4.5 and Lorenzo is 6.5.

These years with my kids aren’t going to last forever and they have grown up so much so quickly already, I will be dammed if I let this disease take so much control over my life that I allow it to rip the memories with my kids away from me.
In my world that isn’t an option, and I don’t think any one or anything should be able to have that much control. 

My whole motto in life and dealing with endometriosis has been;
The moment I give it enough power to control my every day life is the moment I give up.

And unfortunately that day is creeping closer and closer.

By yellowbowsxo

Figuring out how to raise two human beings, while managing an invisible chronic illness.
Follow along this crazy journey I call life.
Mom of Two Boys
Pelvic & Thoracic Endometriosis

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