Self Care; Selfish or Essential

Self care is important.

I think it’s important for anyone and everyone. 

We live in such a busy society that we often put our jobs, partners, kids, pets and friendships before ourselves. 

Each new years eve I always made the resolution going forward to say no more often.

To say no to events, to say no to outings, to spend more time doing the things that I wanted to do or to do the things that fuelled my soul and filled my cup, and I never fulfilled the resolution.

It took a long time to get to this place, but I am here.

I think my disease made a lot of it happen for me.
At this point I need to worry mainly about myself!
I am at a point where my health comes before anything else, and when I say anything else mean it.
Before my husband, before my kids, before friendships and before my job.

Because the reality is and I think we understand the thought process behind it but until life stops you to make it a reality, we don’t seem understand it fully.

You can’t pour from an empty cup.

Theres a meme I see often spread through the endo community and it says
“Do you ever feel that your check engine light is on, but you just keep going through life like, ya its all good”

And as much as that is true, its also not okay.
We need to fuel our minds, bodies and spirits.
I think finding my passion, my drive and my purpose has changed a lot for me.
Its awakened something within me that I have never felt before.

But a thought that I have often is, when does self care become selfish.
I know the importance of taking time for yourself, to ground yourself, to refill your cup.
But at what point does it become selfish?
And does it ever become selfish?
Or is all of it selfish?

I think thats where society comes into play, self doubt comes into play, or constantly telling ourselves that we aren’t worthy of the time and care because we should be doing something for someone else because there is always a long to do list to accomplish.

Finding balance in anything is important, balance is key for any aspect of life.
I think self care balance is really hard to level.
Being chronically ill, I am constantly on the self care bandwagon.
But I also push myself daily to accomplish tasks.
Some that need done and others that don’t, but if I don’t do them than I don’t feel like I have accomplished my duties for the day, even though no one has those exceptions of me except for myself. 

I am often in the bath, heading to bed early, going for massages, going to pelvic floor therapy, or working on my social media platform.
Because all of those areas fuel different aspects of myself. They all help to fill my cup in all different ways.
But I am also noticing that since this shift, more is falling on my husband and more is falling on my kids.

And its not a bad thing, its just a change and change is hard. 

Once again no one has these feelings except for myself.
My husband is constantly pushing me to do all of these things and more, as he is always wanting me to be my best, happiest and healthiest self. 

My kids have not complained and I honestly feel like they are enjoying some of the independence it is creating for them. 

Find your passions, find the things that fuel your soul, and embrace them whole heartedly.

Find the time to put yourself first.
Find the time to fill you cup.
Find the time to do what you truly want to do.
And even though it may take some time, do not feel guilty for it.
A car can’t drive without fuel.
You can’t get coffee from an empty pot.
We can’t give our all when we have nothing left to give. 

By yellowbowsxo

Figuring out how to raise two human beings, while managing an invisible chronic illness.
Follow along this crazy journey I call life.
Mom of Two Boys
Pelvic & Thoracic Endometriosis

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